Well, Then… Moving On

22 Mar

“What the ever lovin’ fuck?!”

We all pretty much felt like this after yesterday’s balagan. But we gotta keep future focused. We have to be like the boys – keep our mouth shut, storm moodily through the mixed zone, board the Evil Bunny Bus and move the fuck on.

Today was the presentation of the unintentionally hilarious (at least for us here at HB & HB) Real Madrid Resort Island. On hand with FloPeezy were Mou (looking like a storm cloud of angst), Iker, Sergio, Karim and Zizou.

Mou: “Get me the fuck out of here so I can go kick some puppies.”

Zizou having total hair envy

There’s a video of FloPeezy talking about the resort in Spanish here. I didn’t seem to hear anything about Callejon rides or Kaka’s House of Horror so predictably I tuned out. I like our version of it better. So, anyone want to meet me there at the OK Jose Corral bar & grill for some stiff whiskey shots later? I especially love the shoot ’em up game they have there where you can pick off certain refs and members of the media. And of course, I’ll totally throw a couple of quarters in the Waitin’ In the Parking Lot boxing game. Then we can ride the Evil Bunny monorail to the other side of the island and get some souvenir sunglasses at Alvaro’s Aviator Hut before taking in the show at Marcelo & Pepe’s Fun House. After that, the Muppet Baby Petting Zoo. We’ll end the day with sunset massages on the beach courtesy of foxy French masseurs Karim & Zizou. If we get a second wind, we’ll head out to Cristiano’s Eurodisco nightspot, Orange, and catch DJ Sese on the decks playing the (worst) in club bangers, while bartender Pipita mixes up some of his special “Hola Bonitas”  to get us ready for the dance floor action. When the Ai Se Eu Te Pego megamix kicks in (and Marcelo starts a conga line), we’ll know it’s finally time to head home. And so ends another perfect day on RMRI! I’m going to hold on to my dreams of Real Madrid Resort Island (HB & HB version) to get me through this tough time.

Another thing getting me through? This adorbs picture of Iker that I saw on GFSports.

Yes, Iker. You can have my autograph AND SO MUCH MORE.

And everyone, TODAY IS THE DAY! Final presentation of my grad school career starts at 9 PM tonight! By 11 PM Eastern, I should be a FREE WOMAN! Thank you for all the support and kind words you have been sending my way. It’s really helping me keep my sanity. xoxo

– Lozil


13 Responses to “Well, Then… Moving On”

  1. kfunk22 March 22, 2012 at 11:33 am #

    also, please never stop writing about RM Resort Island.

    • headbandsandheartbreak March 22, 2012 at 11:36 am #

      I so want to go to there. I think I deserve a vacation on RM Resort Island. I think we ALL deserve a vacation on RM Resort Island. 🙂

  2. em March 22, 2012 at 12:13 pm #

    Do all the foosball tables at RM land have white guys on one team and blaugrana on the other side?

  3. Dreamlover225 March 22, 2012 at 12:16 pm #


  4. Anna March 22, 2012 at 12:27 pm #

    i hope everything goes well for you tonight! i don’t think i’ll ever have the ability to do as much work as you seem to have been doing over the last few months and keep up such an amazing blog, as well as carry on with the rest of my life, you totally deserve to be finishing!
    i’m currently a little depressed that the HB&HB version of the resort island does not exist, i’ve just been in stitches over the ‘evil bunny monorail’ and the Ai Se Eu Te Pego megamix/marcelo conga– i don’t think i could bring myself to leave cris’ eurodisco nightspot if that happened!

  5. jellyace March 22, 2012 at 12:28 pm #

    I propose we make RM Resort Island a special feature here! It’s much more enjoyable than the you-know-what-we-wish-we-could-unsee-thing yesterday.

    A toast to you on your Freedom from papers! Congratulations, Lozil!

  6. Forlond March 22, 2012 at 12:46 pm #

    Congratz and good luck on presentation 🙂

    Mou in a suit. I almost forgot how that looks like. Answer: very good. An Zizou is still looking smokin’. I already had my fare share of rage-y feelings over at hala so I’ll just focus on positive, we still have 6pts lead. This time last year Barca had I think 5pts lead and nobody even considered them not winning it.

  7. manie March 22, 2012 at 1:18 pm #

    Congratulations!!!!!! I am going to be a grad school student soon, so seeing someone make it out on the other end makes me relieved. And very, very happy for you!!! Good luck!

  8. KatiePar March 22, 2012 at 1:18 pm #

    Good luck on your presentation. 🙂 And congrats!
    The RM Resort Island sounds fantastic. Maybe we can book a ticket for several days and really enjoy the attractions…like the …ahem….Muppet Baby Petting Zoo. 🙂 No red cards allowed there.
    And the Evil-Bunny-Monorail had me in stitches.

  9. Natalie March 22, 2012 at 4:04 pm #

    I love ur resort idea, if only it was a reality!
    Good luck with the paper!

  10. Izan March 22, 2012 at 8:49 pm #

    ‘Zizou having total hair envy’! hahaha…u are so funny!

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