Tuesday Training, Junkgate

7 Jan
Beard training

Is he the new beard trainer that Xabi hired out of desperation?

Because I’m not sure how much longer we can deal with Karim’s Amish beard. ::shudder::  Well, people, I’m a Lozil-sicle today. When I left the house, it was 6F with a windchill of -19F.  We all look like Randy in A Christmas Story here. This ‘polar vortex’ can piss off back to Santa Land where it belongs, thank you very much. Stay warm!

The team trained along with Jose Rodriguez in preparation for Thursday’s Copa Del Rey match against Osasuna.

And now, let us talk of “Junkgate” ::eye roll:: So, as he was subbed off yesterday, Angel was being whistled by the Bernabeu “faithful” and he squeezed his crotch for a hot second. Cue uproar. The Spanish vultures media immediately said he was directing it at the fans. Angel said he was adjusting himself after running and I have to say, I believe him. After I’ve jogged around, I have to adjust my rack, so it stands to reason. Shit gets…out of place.  So, I’m feeling you, Angel. Well, erm, actually, bad choice of words there. I understand. But of course, that’s not good enough for anyone. So he had to apologize and make a video and statement. SMDH.


Di María: “I made a natural movement which was not aimed at anyone in particular”

“I did not plan to do anything aimed at the fans or the manager; it was something normal, but if there is anyone who was offended by this, I apologise”, the midfielder added

Real Madrid overcame Celta de Vigo in the Santiago Bernabéu in the first competitive match of the year and Ángel Di María wanted to talk to Realmadrid.com and Realmadrid TV about the situation which has been discussed in the media following his substitution. “I made a normal gesture when I was going off. I did not want to do anything aimed at the fans or the manger either like people were saying. It was a natural movement which all men make especially when you are running. You do it a lot on the pitch. The truth is that if anyone was offended by it I apologise, but it is like I have said. I made a natural movement which was not aimed at anyone in particular. On the TV you can see that it is a fraction of a second. It is nothing. I did not spend a long time deliberately doing it. It was something natural. I apologise to the people who may be offended by what I did, but it was not aimed at anyone”.

Real Madrid has started an investigation to clear up what happened, something the Argentine thinks is a good idea: “I think it is the right thing to do. Not just for them, who have started the investigation, but also for me as it means I can explain the situation and what happened, as I have also already explained to several Argentine radio stations. I think it is good as I can talk to them directly and explain what happened on the pitch”.

With regards to Di María’s own situation in the team, the midfielder admitted that: “The truth is that I am fine, apart from this subject which makes me feel bad because of all the things which have been said and keep on being said. I am very well and very happy. I am training in the same way and the manager still trusts in me. I have to carry on this way, working hard, to reach the end of the season in the best shape and to be able to win the trophies we are aiming for”.

Judge for yourself.  He’s not looking at the crowd, he’s not making any sort of defiant face. He’s barely touching himself. (I can’t believe I’m trying to qualify how long someone is touching their private parts and what that means). I mean, remember when Joey “I Love Gays! Really I Do! And Morrissey!” Barton grabbed his crotch and called Nando a fucking poof? You knew Joey was insulting someone. Obvious. This Angel moment? Ehhhhh, I’m not seeing this. But you know some people love to get their knickers in a twist. They’ll take it as an insult because they want to. Doesn’t help that the transfer window is open and people are being total idiots as usual.
Maybe we need a new slogan? Some suggestions:

Real Madrid: If There’s Not Any Drama, Someone Will Manufacture It For Us

Real Madrid: We Adjust Our Dicks. Deal With It.

Real Madrid: Back The Fuck Off. We Have Enough Issues.

Real Madrid: Can We Just Play Football? Please?


– Lozil

13 Responses to “Tuesday Training, Junkgate”

  1. Phédre January 7, 2014 at 2:54 pm #

    ‘We adjust our dicks. Deal with it.’ gets my vote! Hilarious!
    That was in no way an insult to the fans. Who makes up these things?

  2. Suse January 7, 2014 at 2:59 pm #

    The first one is soooo true but I love the second one 🙂

    We have bad weather in Europe but not so bad as yours in US! Keep well and stay warm!

  3. KJEzelle January 7, 2014 at 3:07 pm #

    I’d like to suggest “Real Madrid: Everyone is obsessed with our ball handling.”

  4. Dr. Heidi January 7, 2014 at 3:28 pm #

    I would vote for Sergio ‘polishing the jewels’ and telepathically saying to me ‘thinking of you Heidi’.

  5. Tatiana January 7, 2014 at 3:59 pm #

    I love Sese’s support for ADM after the crotch-gate. I mean posting that picture with him thumbs up and in front of poster of Michael Jackson holding his crotch…

  6. Sara January 7, 2014 at 4:11 pm #

    As much as I understand that you´re freezing as h*ell over there in the states right now, I just can´t help to be a bit jealous too… Usually in Sweden, this time of year we would have steady temperatures below zero (celcius, that is. In Fahrenheit, I guess that´s below 30-ish) and a nice white layer covering most parts of the country. But this winter has been the warmest for ages – it just doesn´t stop raining! It´s so depressing! There is barely any snow even up in the most northern parts of Sweden – and that´s very rare. So what about you Americans pass that cold weather over to us here in northern Europe, ok? (I would say both parts win :-)).

    Regarding Angel and him being a bit touchy feely with himself – Spanish press just can´t be any more ridiculous. Please… My vote totally goes to the slogan: Real Madrid: We Adjust Our Dicks. Deal With It. 😀

    • mygypsyspirit January 7, 2014 at 6:49 pm #

      I think what’s most surprising about this weather is that it’s so cold in the southern US. I live in Georgia, where in the winter it doesn’t usually get below 40F (about 5-ish C). Last night the windchill was at 0F! As a kid, I lived in the northeast. I remember days I would walk outside and it was so cold that my nostrils stuck together when I breathed in. It was fairly normal to have a couple of days a year that were below zero. Pipes have been bursting at people’s houses down here because the pipes aren’t insulated against this type of cold! You can have it back!

      • PMom_GA January 7, 2014 at 11:23 pm #

        *pokes head from groundhog-like hole while trying to avoid the freeze*


        *returns to groundhog-like hole*

  7. Katie Ann January 7, 2014 at 5:08 pm #

    It’s so cold my car doors were frozen shut this morning. Then, when I finally got them open and tried to drive to work, my car got stuck in the driveway because it was too icy. So ridiculous!

    Not as ridiculous as this nonsense Angel is going through, however. Bad enough the fans whistled him off.

  8. Christine January 7, 2014 at 5:20 pm #

    I love Spain but the press are such vultures. They love to make a mountain out of a mole hill. DiMaria did nothing wrong. Geez I’ve seen more sack handling waiting for the bus and these dudes are just standing.

  9. mygypsyspirit January 7, 2014 at 6:51 pm #

    Spanish press have obviously never watched a baseball game (not that I’d blame them much for steering clear. *snoozefest*). I’m beginning to think our motto should be “Real Madrid: Where we apologize for shit we didn’t do.”

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