World Cup 2014 – Group A: Match Report: Mexico 1 – Cameroon 0

14 Jun

Also known as SPOILER ALERT the Match where Giovanni Dos Santo did not get a goal END SPOILER ALERT.

Mexico: Peralta 61’


Ochoa; Rodriguez, Marquez, Moreno, Layun, Aguilar; Guardado, Herrera, Vazquez; Dos Santos, Peralta
Itandje; Assou-Ekotto, Nkoulou, Mbia, Chedjou; Djeugoue, Enoh Song; Moukandjo, Choupo Moting; Eto’o

Note: I couldn’t watch the game because of work, so I caught the extended highlights instead. I’m not a fan since it’s choppy pieces of play put together, making it hard to get an overall feel of how the teams are playing but I’ll try my best at a match report.

Probably going to be the main man this match for Cameroon.

Wow this is a rainy match, I’m expecting lots of slips and slides to happen. Also good job rain in making the jerseys stick to the players, really makes their underwear lines visible since both teams are wearing light coloured shorts (note how I am reporting all the vital stuff).

My pots and pans brush looks exactly like that guy’s head.

I don’t want this World Cup to be about the refereeing, but it seems like the guys with the whistles insist on making it about themselves. 11 minutes in, Aguilar whips in a cross from the left which connects with Dos Santos and it’s IN. Except it’s not, the assistant referee had raised the offside flag, but Dos Santos was definitely on side, level at the worst. It’s always the worst to lose because your goals were incorrectly disallowed cough Borussia Dortmund cough Mats Hummels cough so even I feel bad for Mexico right now.

Dos Santos and the Very Bad Not Good Disallowed Goal Day

Mexico has a couple good attacks, but none of their shots were on target. Cameroon’s Choupo Moting puts the goal behind the keeper into the net but that is actually correctly disallowed since the flag’s been up way before he was shooting. So right now 50/50 on the right/wrong goals disallowed, not a good percentage refs.

The only goal that was correctly ruled offside of the 3.

Oh my dear! It’s Dos Santos again in the 29th minute, and this time it was from a corner that he headed in. This one may have been a little hard to judge since the Cameroonians and Mexican players were all over each other and not covering anyone well but once again, Dos Santos was level at best and not beyond the last defender. Now I’m wondering at the angle the assistant referee is standing at, because two mistakes of this calibre? That is not world cup quality.

(Poor Baby) Dos Santos either a. killed kitties b. stole candy from kids or c. walked under a ladder for this kind of luck.

Coach Herrera of Mexico is wet and displeased, Mou would’ve kicked the referee by now and gotten sent off.

Not much happened for the rest of the first half, and I only say this because my highlights video does not show the rest of the second half. But right after the second half starts, I see Barca’s Alex Song (who I forgot still exists) go studs in on… if you guessed GIOVANI DOS SANTOS you guessed right (wow what did he do in a past life to deserve the game’s he’s had today?). Consistent with the refereeing of the game, it went unnoticed and unpunished. I’ve put Cameroon in the doghouse for that players strike but now this just makes them really unlikable.

Not cool Alex Song, as if (Poor Baby) Dos Santos hasn’t had a crappy match already.

Finally! A legitimate goal that is allowed to stand is scored by Peralta in the 61st minute! It’s (Poor Baby) Dos Santos who makes the run into the box and attempts a low shot the keeper palms away (really should’ve been able to hold on to the ball there) onto the feet of Oribe Peralta who sweeps it into the net. Am I the only wondering if (Poor Baby) Dos Santo’s first attempt went in, it probably wouldn’t be able to stand anyways?

Yay finally something worth celebrating about!

Look at that goal and look how deservedly happy Coach Herrera is!

A couple good chances from Cameroon to equalize. Ochoa who hasn’t looked that troubled so far manages a good save. Cameroon showed their teeth a little too late and Mexico goes on to win 1-0. I guess they deserve some tequila with that horchata after all.

A great save on what could’ve been the equalizer from Ochoa.

In terms of internet speak, (Poor Baby) Dos Santos just cannot.

Once again, ending it on a good note of the (finally) happy Mexican players.



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