Tag Archives: Oh Honey No

Little Shop Of (Denim) Horrors

19 Feb

So I was in the Century 21 (a big NYC discount store) and ran into a collection of denim clearly curated by Sergio and Guti because let’s be honest, who else could it be? Continue reading

Something That Did NOT Make My Day: Llorente Fashion Horror

16 Jun

Lord knows I love me some Lion King but is that a leather jacket with jorts? Oh hells no, my Llove.  A sick part of me wants to know what shoes he’s wearing. I’m betting they are mandals. Just a sneaky feeling. His poor friend Damian has an expression like “Oh…um…do we really need to share a picture of this moment, dude? You’re….I mean I’m not really dressed properly and um, yeah okay, whatever. ::resigned sigh::” Let’s cleanse the palate by enjoying some Fer in Armani.

– Lozil

Throwback Thursday Hair Horror

3 Jul

512c04f9As you all know, we here at HB & HB  love to bitch and moan about the horrific hairstyles ‘ballers foist upon us. But honestly, kids, we don’t know real pain. I thought I’d just remind y’all what that’s about. But warning: this is not for the faint of heart. Case in point: Luis Figo who is looking all suave and urbane in the fotito above. Sure, he sometimes wears challenging attire when playing golf, but that’s whimsical. Cute, right? Mildly quirky! Well, back in 1991, Figo looked like this… Continue reading

World Cup 2014 – Karim Benzema: Menace II Society

26 Jun

10401571_661821107244101_654793905_nI mean, it’s one thing if young ‘uns like Antoine Griezmann want to fangirl over Karim like he’s Harry Styles and emulate his poor hair choices. But it’s something completely different when Karim’s follicular tragedies unduly influence one of our best and brightest fully grown men.  Yes, someone else has fallen under the sway of the dead animal pelt coiffure. And it breaks my heart to tell you who. Continue reading

It Just Keeps Getting Better!

13 Jan

tumblr_mzco5lVxke1rjev45o1_500Man, I love the Ballon D’or. This is what Dani Alves chose to wear for his portrait. And you think that’s merely an ugly ass Cosby sweater? Oh no, people, it has leather fringe! Continue reading

UPDATED: That Awkward Moment When You Match The Red Carpet

13 Jan

MessiAs promised, Messi’s red suit. This screenshot doesn’t show how horrifically shiny it is, but the next one gives you an idea. Continue reading

Okay, Sese, You’re Off The Hook (For Now)

8 Nov

tumblr_mvya173Unr1sy35u0o8_1280So someone has actually out Sergio Ramosed Sergio Ramos in the fashion department. Not possible you say? Well, I beg to differ.  I give you the fashion stylings of Barca’s Alex Song.

Now normally I wouldn’t pay much attention to Alex now that he’s no longer a Gunner, but I stumbled upon John Brennan’s article on SWOL and had to share the photos he compiled because they are jaw dropping.  I think I’m going to need to check Song’s Instagram regularly.

Let’s start out with a mild one. Red jeans, green shoes. ::shrug:: That’s just Guti going out to get a newspaper, right? But that’s just the tip of the fashion disaster iceberg. Continue reading

Silas From The Da Vinci Code Gives Presser/Jese Interview

31 Jul


Yeah, the Sergio’s hideous hair jokes keep coming. Not my fault he’s rocking the Silas look. Our bleached blonde boy met the press yesterday. Continue reading

Updated: The Team Heads To The US, Sergio Apparently Has Head Injury & Thinks He’s Neymar

28 Jul
Reconocimientos

You better take off your clothes a lot this summer. Just sayin’

There is no other explanation for him showing up with that shitshow of a hairdo. Xabi Alonso is off screen vomiting into a trash can. Sese, why you wanna ruin The Pretty?! ::shudder::

The team is all back together! The rest of the squad arrived, had their medicals and then headed for the airport. UPDATED TO ADD MORE PICTURES FROM THE PLANE Continue reading

Hair (So Very) Apparent

25 Jul
Presentaciýn_de_la_segunda_equipaciýn_del_Real_Madrid_2013-14 (25)

“What do you mean by ‘what’s wrong with your hair?!’ My hair is perfect!”

Please forgive me for getting this post up so late, but I’ve been sitting and staring at these pictures from our new away kit launch for hours trying to figure out what I could possibly say. I’m truly at a loss about Karim’s barnet. It looks like someone took a crap on his head. I’m serious! And the worst part is that they exposed innocent children to that montrosity during a Q & A session.  Let’s take a look at it up close, shall we? Continue reading