Tag Archives: Oh Honey No

No Thanks.

21 Jul

1f72de6cf24711e2851922000a9e084f_7Oh man, you know I love me some Mesut but when I saw this picture, all I could think was “Lordy, he looks like a total douchebag.” Continue reading

Sort That Out Before You Return To Madrid, Young Man!

10 Jul

1005310_481602251931226_17828499_nOh Karim. WHY?! You really need to do something about that asymmetrical dead animal puff/pelt on your head pronto. Who told you that was a good look? Who?  Because they so obviously HATE YOUR GUTS. Friends don’t let friends look like they’ve stapled roadkill onto their scalp.  Dreadful. Just dreadful. He’s gone straight into Men On Film territory.

(PS Karim shared that picture to wish everyone Ramadan Mubarak. HB & HB extends the same wishes to all our Muslim Watishistas. Kul ‘am wa enta bi-khair!)

– Lozil

Call Me Old Fashioned…

18 Jun

No5…but I think butt cleavage is for private times…and plumbers. So I was surprised to see Wojciech Szczęsny’s lady friend Patrycja Wojnarowska flashing crack at a social eventContinue reading

Poor Liverpool!

4 Jun

pepe ReinaPurple must be in the ‘in’ color for keepers this year, eh? Lordy. Poor Pepe Reina. Want to see the rest of Liverpool’s new kits? Are you SURE? Because you may need some serious brain bleach. Don’t say I didn’t warn ya! Continue reading

That Just Ain’t Right!

5 Apr

barca-shirtsI’ve been in meetings all day and didn’t have a chance to see these until Shigs sent me an incredulous email. I raced over to Dirty Tackle to see the potential new Barca training shirts and almost spit out my coffee. Holy shit! When it debuted, I thought nothing could be worse than their infamous Tequila Sunrise kit, but this is just…OMFG. Cules & bi-teamuals, please know that our thoughts are with you at this difficult time.  It’s going to be just as painful for us to look at these things as it is for you. Trust me.

– Lozil

Fashion Dos And Don’ts: The Ballon d’Or

7 Jan

BABUPxTCEAABMR4DO show up in a classic tux with a gorgeous Russian supermodel on your arm. Even if you don’t win the award you so richly deserve, no one can fault your style.  Continue reading

Oh FFS, Sergio!

31 Aug

Sergio, honey child, those shorts must go. Wearing the loafers without socks and the button down Oxford shirt, you look like you were on the road to something rather Xabi-centric but the addition of those dreadful shorts took you straight into some seriously dodgy territory. I mean, this is pretty tame compared to some of the crap you wear, but to have you come sooooo close and then tank it? Sigh. (Photo from GF Sports)

– Lozil

Training, Concentracion & So Much More

28 Aug

What’s caught your eye, Pipita? Looks like it’s Mesut.

The last training before the Super Copa final took place this afternoon. New dad Pepe was there along with new signing Modric (aka Null Null aka Nullie).  Continue reading

Cristiano, What The HELL Are You Wearing?!

24 Aug

No offense to the absolutely adorable girl in the picture (@ApoyoCR7) but what the ever loving fuck is Cristiano wearing?!  It looks like a traffic cone and a practice bib mated. And for the love of all that’s holy, is the brim of that backwards hat, studded/bedazzled?!?!  Because otherwise, he’s wearing a bazillion earrings in one ear like I did when I was a wayward teenager smoking behind the bleachers. Continue reading

Absolutely And Utterly Do. Not. Want.

13 Aug

I really need to stay away from Instagram. I must. Tonight Kaka’s wife Carol said she wants to read (or is reading) the 50 Shades of Grey books and I almost had heart failure. I sounded like Shiggers when Kaka was walking towards us to do his corner at Yankees Stadium. I had a hand over my mouth in horror going “No, no, no, no, NO!”  The idea of this is just horrifying to me. It’s also kinda funny because this weekend on our road trip we decided to buy the book on a whim (okay, after quite a bit of whiskey) and dramatically read excerpts aloud while drinking cocktails with predictably hilarious results (poor ginboonmiller, he got dragged into a whole girls’ weekend experience and bless him, he rolled with it all). Is Kaka really gonna be down with Carol reading mommy porn?! Oy vey.

– Lozil